By Smita Samanwita
There exists a span of time that happens to be my personal corner. I delve deep into my thoughts, introspect, retrospect, analyze, and realize. This side of me probably comes from my genetic disposition augmented by my subject, Psychology. So, the other day, a question popped up in my mind asking me when do we actually die? Is physical death all about dying? My mind started ruminating all over again!
Here I would quote a virtue, “When wealth is lost, nothing is lost; when health is lost something is lost, but, when character is lost, everything is lost.” A positive connotation is that our intangible resources such as virtues, morals, values, ethics, leave an indelible imprint on our lives, not the materialistic acquisitions. Wealth can be procured back if lost. But the erosion of moral fabric causes a loss that can’t be undone!
Table of Contents
Ethics and Childhood
‘Ethics’ cannot be fed or funneled into a person as it is the culmination of genetic disposition and what we imbibe from the surrounding. It can be developed in a child from the time of its inception by engaging in healthy and balanced child-rearing practices, practicing proper toilet training, imparting unconditional positive regard to the child, providing a less judgemental set up for the child to flourish with constant reinforcement and positive feedback.
A punishment that is reasonable, justified, moderate, and timely given to the child can do wonders. Ethics, a set of morals, depicts how to conduct in a society, whereas morals are more individualistic. Less authoritarian, more authoritative, and democratic parenting can bear fruitful results in developing the morals of a child. Less demanding, Less speculative parenting is healthy whereas apathetic and ignorant parenting can deter the growth of child.
Empathy i.e. placing our feet in someone else’s shoes to take their perspective is a must for parents. If a child develops sympathy and generosity, his/her magnanimity can induce a greater amount of agility, equanimity into the society along with propinquity i.e. affinity towards other people to know their needs. Optimism is another such ingredient for inducing positivity in a child. With all such reinforcements, accountability, and transparency develop in the child.
The child eventually becomes the youth that is the torchbearer of the nation with maximum untapped potential. For a healthy youth, a sound childhood is necessary. These thoughts seem so hunky-dory!
How well do they materialize? Do we incessantly stick to the morals that we imbibed?
In recent times of din and bustle, we are preoccupied with meeting our ‘ends’. What about the ‘means’? Are ‘means’ ethical and justified? Can it prove to be satisfying when one strives to achieve the goal state or ends while compromising on the means? Can taking short cuts give us perpetual success? Erosion of moral fabric is rampant now as people stoop so low to satiate their hunger for power and glory, endangering the existence of others, putting them at stake. These are the times witnessing cut-throat competition. Honesty, morality, compassion, sharing, and caring attitude have taken the back seat. Some of us have traded our values for undue profits and gains. We have become self-indulgent, self-obsessed, narcissists in our fast-paced lives.
All this is a consequence of the limited available resources that everyone is fighting for at the cost of morality. The rampant increase in intolerance, jealousy, lust anger, hatred, prejudice, stereotypes, dogmatic views, bigotry,ex and increasing insecurities of people has taken a toll on a healthy lifestyle and sound mental health.
Crime has increased manifold. Cases of murders, rapes, molestation, burglary, eve-teasing, honor killings, cyberbullying, drug abuse have skyrocketed. The suicide rate is also shooting up. In this period of modernization and westernized style of living, we are departing ourselves from the teachings of our rich culture, the religious scriptures that portray the victory of virtuous and defeat of evils and vices. Hence, we have become victims of dogmas that divide society.
For the abatement such a cataclysmic situation, one needs to go back to the roots, resort to a middle path (Madhya marg) for a balanced view in life.
Dharma, Artha, Karma and Moksha
The four Purusartha comprising of ‘dharma’, ‘artha’, ‘kama’, ‘moksha’ are definitely the ones that are our goals. Dharma i.e. our righteousness and moral duty should be upheld in case of conflict with artha and kama that depict economic prosperity and pleasure respectively. Moksha should be our ultimate goal. It is rightly said, ‘As you sow, so shall you reap’. Hence our actions should be taken care of!
I would mention here, ‘Charity begins at home’. So a child should inculcate good values and learn to do justice to our loved ones. Then he/she can do justice to mankind at large. If as an adult we waver from our paths, we can ask for help, guidance, counseling. Asking for help pertaining to mental health does no harm, rather it helps us cleanse our selves and get a reality check. The ultimate goal should be to control our vices, our anger, frustration, lust, greed, selfish motives, keep them in check and channelize them towards a more philanthropic and empathetic side. Also, stringent laws should be enforced to make people conform to them for maintaining social order.
If you are feeling a bit off and start feeling that I have nothing to do or I am not doing enough or what am I doing with my life, these thoughts are signs that you need to relax. It is important to understand that it is just a feeling! So here are a few Things to Relax yourself And Recharge
Death is not the greatest loss
I would remind you of a well-heard-of quote, ‘Death is not the greatest loss in life, the greatest loss is what dies within us when we are alive’.
The path might not be easy or smooth, but one who cultivates perseverance, consistency, and willpower along with an unflinching motivation, no hurdle can obstruct the person by any means. It’s all about living a qualitative life, not a quantitative one. Just in order to ‘fit-in’ to the prevalent trend, we develop a herd-mentality that makes us conform to and comply with the opinion of majority. But one who maintains his idiosyncrasy listens to the conscience, becomes a self-made person. Never giving up is the key to rise and shine!
Here’s something for Women health: How to be a Healthy woman and live a healthy life. Hope this helps you to get back to good routine and life 🙂
About the Author
Smita, 24, is a student of Master Psychology, a Physics graduate, a literature enthusiast practicing Nichiren Buddhism. She blogs at www.bloggggit.wordpress.com and on instagram @the_indomitable_26. She has featured as a writer in the book L’amour published by Poetic Imagica